Sexy in the kitchen. A Christmas Special.

Oh dear dear Delia, saint of the kitchen, I am watching your Christmas special and I am bored, so bored, (ooh she just mentioned silver balls and alluded to something turning into a creamy liquid). The Radio Times tells me that she will be preparing her best cranberry and orange relish, scallops in the shell, fillet of beef with mushroom and red wine sauce, roasted bacon with blackened crackling, a chocolate and sour cherry crumble and a gorgeous pannetone trifle. She also said at beginning of the programme that her turkey is never dry. Yawn!

I know that Delia is a Goddess but, the one that does it for me in the Christmas kitchen, is the luscious Nigella Lawson. She may make super rich food for super rich folk but she knows how to baste a breast to keep it juicy and finish things off by hand whilst whisking up something creamy. Cooking in a tight sweater never looked so good.

Hang on, Delia is doing Nigella language now – she just said ‘thickened and firmer’. Maybe I’ll stay with this. The cranberry and orange relish looks easy to make. Also the beouf en croute looks yummy and very French and I’m becoming optimistic about her cheese and parsnip roularde, a veggie dish for Christmas . She’s now rolling out the sausage meat suggestively. Maybe I was wrong about Delia. However the not –so-sexy radio voice of Terry Wogan keeps on interupting the programme, Delia-interuptus. I’ll tell you summat, dear old Delia makes the cooking very simple. Maybe, after all, she is a real Christmas Cracker for the older generation. Oooh she’s whipping furiously now and popping her hot cherries into a bowl!!!!

I’m looking forward to Rick Stein’s Christmas Odyssey on Thursday night 9pm BBC2 but if he starts getting flirty with me and flinging his jellied eel about I’ll not be doing 'morning after' cold turkey with him!